I Mostly Like Free-Lance

I’ve been self-employed for just over ten years now, scraping by on a meager income. I love the independence. I can say “yes” when I want and “no” when I want. I do work that I enjoy and value. I interact with people who are sincere and generous.

I don’t mind having very little money because I don’t crave stuff and things. I live modestly. I’m fortunate that I’ve found a rental situation that I can afford and is safe and comfortable. I’m fortunate that I enjoy cooking and baking, so I eat well despite not being able to dine frequently at all the wonderful restaurants nearby. Most importantly, I’m fortunate that I live in an area I truly love. So, it doesn’t matter that I don’t have money to travel the world; there is so much right around me that is endlessly delightful.

But. There are downsides to free-lance work. Basically, if I don’t work, I don’t get paid. I have no sick leave and no paid vacation. I don’t usually consider these to be problems; I like working and I’m mostly healthy. Right now, however, I’m not. Nothing serious or life-threatening. I’ve had a sinus infection for nearly three weeks. I feel like crap. It is very hard to get any work done. I’ve got deadlines to meet, and proposals for work to send out.

And I can’t smell anything. Food doesn’t taste good. This is especially frustrating during the time of year when food is my focus. Not wanting to eat on Thanksgiving is a drag.

I have a bad attitude. I’ve tried not to dwell on it, but damn! I am sick of being sick. I’ve only been able to do mindless work: I’ve been knitting boot socks. Lots of boot socks. At least that’s something. I’m on my sixth pair. I do need them. So, these past couple weeks haven’t been a total loss.

When I feel better (soon), I will completely – not just mostly – like free-lance.